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Friday, June 26, 2015

Let's Not Go There For Women's Sports at UofL -- Adidas Design...Friday Cardinal Couple


This is ridiculous
The University of Louisville has aligned their sportswear with most of us know. Nike...who is the most popular of the sportswear clothiers...would probably love to see the Cardinals fly over to their camp. It'll never happen as long as Rick Pitino patrols the Denny Crum Court sidelines and Tom Jurich has Athletic Director next to his name.

Adidas has designed new football uniforms for Bobby Petrino's football team. Of particular scrutiny is the stern looking bird in the helmet.

Dear sirs...what in the heck are you doing with Louie the Cardinal Bird? 

I get that football is a mean, tough and tumble sport. You don't get points for niceness. This disturbed looking avian, though....that looks like he is getting ready to take a peck at this football players too over the top.

If I saw a bird like this in my backyard...I'd head back in the house and call Animal Control Services. Or Alfred Hitchcock.

This rendition of the Cardinal Bird has to go. Or, at the very least, have its progression stopped and limited just to football.

Louie the Barbarian. 

Affixing Louie the Barbarian to this uniform would be
the only possible reason not to give Katie George a hug.
I don't want to interview Mariya Moore, Marissa Becker, Katie George or Chile Garcia after a game and have to stare at this obviously rabid and dangerous predator. I just might borrow my neighbor J.D.'s shotgun and keep the beast at a respectable distance. Or put it out of its misery and deranged state of existence. 

And...if they decide to give Louie the Mascot an overhaul and include this hideous facial portrayal of our university symbol and state will be running out of the KFC YUM! Center is fear and trepidation instead of running to Louie for hugs and high fives. 

Adidas, you've crossed the line.

This is our bird. Don't mess with it
(Uhh...the one on the left...)
Dump this psychopathic-looking disaster and don't mess with our bird. Send this Louie the Barbarian to Ball State, Iowa State or any other college or university that has Cardinals after their name. 

If Daryl from The Walking Dead saw this thing in the woods...there'd be no hesitation in arching a arrow right through the cranium.

Walker Texas Ranger would lock it up immediately. Arnold Schwarzenegger would terminate it. Ralphie from Christmas Story would refuse to wear it and Clark Griswold would give it to his Cousin Eddie. Donald Trump would fire it. If it ever appeared as a logo on the Papa John Stadium Football carper, I'd encourage and applaud the opposing team to stomp on it. 

No bueno, Adidas. This does nothing to promote the joy and excitement of Cardinal Athletics. 

If our football team walks out on the field wearing these asinine, preposterous helmets (and shoes) down in Atlanta against Auburn...I hope we lose by 40.

(OK, maybe that's a bit over the top...but...please, dear God...don't take this nightmare to Atlanta..)

This Ball State Cardinal is bad enough. The new
Louisville Adidas Bird makes the Ball State logo
look benign and wholesome.
Can you imagine Louie the Barbarian sitting in the Stanford Cardinal Tree?

Stephen King might nod approvingly...but that'd just be an abomination.

What's next...a change of the saying "Louisville First, Cards Forever" to "Total Degradation and Nightmares for my Five Year Old"? 

Big Red, the lovable WKU mascot with an evil grimace and blood dripping from his rotund, red body? The Florida Gator with a disembodied senior citizen dangling from his jaws?  

Somewhere Hunter Thompson is smiling. Fear and loathing has finally come to Louisville. 

Leave our bird alone. And bury this mistake in the sandpit for the long jump over at Cardinal Park or underneath the Johnny Unitas statue in Papa John's.



  1. Paul, I am not sure where you land on the look and feel of the new uniforms. You really do need to do a better job of expressing your opinion.

    1. I can be so indecisive and uncertain at times....

    2. Hey Paulie I agree. If UofL ever develops this doo-doo as a standard logo, I'll go out on the field or court and stomp on it.

      What are we? Call of Duty?

      Nick O.

    3. I hope this isn't the case -- but if our athletic department is spending money on stuff like this instead of funding some of thye non-revenue sport sufficiently -- they all need to be fired.

      Do you think traditional football powers like Auburn, Alabama. LSU, Oklahoma or Nebreaska are resorting to stupid stuff like this?

      Oh, that's right, we're not a traditional football power. More like a Beatles cover band. If we wear this embarrasment for any of our home games -- I'm staying in the parking lot and tailgating.

      Morons. Give the money to softball for indoor plumbing inside Ulmer Stadium.

      Blue Lou

  2. I think you might be interested in an outsiders idea :). Detroit apparently love our helmets.

  3. Wonderful. Box them up, Bobby and send them to the Lions

  4. It is the first step in the plan to change our school nickname to The Angry Birds.

    Tom Jurich. A stinking genius.

    We should wear these on Halloween

    1. Great article by Detroit CBS! I didn't know they let 3rd graders write for their Sports Department. Mom and Dad must be so proud.
      Maybe next week he'll do a feature on his new skateboard.

      Walter Cronkite

  5. I heard that Android that Fox NFL Football has clanking around on their Sunday Broadcasts would lend Louisville his uniform design if asked. Good old UofL. Always coming up with something to keep me entertained if I'm not busy tracking all the guys Calipari sends to the NBA each year.

    Did Montrezl ever get picked?

    Matthew Mitchell For Governor

    1. I was watching for Frank the Tank. The Badgers continue to send their best regards to you, Calipari, the entire UK fan base and the imaginary perfect season that only existed in the ether and on the sunburned, prematurely inked & freckled appendages of UK the of true believers.

  6. The rendering on the shoes looks like a scalded chicken


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