Monday, December 23, 2013
MONDAY CARDINAL COUPLE -- Dear Santa
MONDAY CARDINAL COUPLE
- All I want for Christmas is...Santa looks at UofL's list
You know the guy with the beard is mighty busy this time of year. No, I'm not talking about Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson...the reference is to Jolly Ol' St. Nick. They say he's making a list and checking it twice. Maybe he should share his planning strategies with the AAC Conference officials...if anyone ever needed guidance, it would be them.
We were able to gain exclusive content of what some of the UofL women's sports teams players and coaches have asked Santa Claus for this Christmas. Whether or not the Jolly Ol' Fat Man delivers or not is hard to say...but if you believe in the spirit of Christmas...hang your stockings by the chimney with care and hope that he comes through this year.
Jeff Walz writes:
I've been a (pretty) good boy this year. Forget those technicals...but if your elves were as contentious, blind and without a clue as these refs I have to deal with each season...I'm sure you'd understand. Here's my Christmas list and if you have any questions about it, call me on my talk show Wednesday nights between 6 and 7 pm.
- Consistency in officiating
- Two 6'6" centers who can rebound, score and stay out of foul trouble
- A win in my final game of the season
- A clean bill of health for Sherrone, Nita and Starr
- An all expenses paid trip for my buddy Geno and his basketball team to Italy for four months. They could leave New Year's Day and come back right before Derby.
- A magic potion that makes players good free throw shooters.
( The letter was delivered with several vouchers for free beer at the KFC YUM! Center during WBB games...)
Anne Kordes writes:
Hi Big Guy with the funny hat!
My Christmas letter (all 18 pages of it) is attached. Here's a brief summary of the highlights and priorities. Or, you can simply just stop by for a chat...I can always use a little help changing diapers, tracking down loose volleyballs and keeping Nancy Worley off Twitter. Here goes:
Could I please have a couple of middles that come in and play like Gwen Rucker, Randi Ewing and Brooke Mattingly did? I'm OK if they're rebuilds or slightly used.
Would you deliver a libero that has the skills of Caitlin Welch? I know that's a tough order to fill...but I'll get you a great table at the Volleyball banquet and unlimited wine refills if you deliver.
I'd also like a certificate that shows my team and I are granted automatic access to the NCAA Regionals. This is the third year I've asked for it. You keep leaving coal and sticks in my stocking.
( Anne's letter was delivered by Katie George and Maya McClendon..who were whooping, screaming and stomping all the way up Santa's sidewalk at the North Pole. Katie then set it up perfectly for Maya, who slammed it through the Claus front window.)
Finally, this from SHONI ..
SEASONS GREETINGS FROM THE LAND OF NO LOOK PASSES AND DEEP THREES!
I'VE HAD A PRETTY GOOD YEAR AND DON'T REALLY NEED MUCH THIS YEAR BUT I HAVE A LOT OF FRIENDS AND ACQUAINTANCES THAT COULD USE SOME THINGS. I AM A NATIVE AMERICAN AND I'D LIKE YOU TO MAKE ALL PEOPLE AWARE OF THE PLIGHT AND TROUBLES THAT MY PEOPLE SUFFER. PLEASE END THE STEREOTYPES AND MISNOMERS THAT ARE ASSOCIATED WITH OUR LIFESTYLES, HERITAGE AND TRADITIONS.
I'VE BEEN A GOOD GIRL AND TRAVELLED THE NATION SPEAKING ON BEHALF OF THESE ISSUES. GRANT ME THE STRENGTH AND ABILITY TO CONTINUE MY CAUSE AND QUEST. I KNOW IT'S A BIG ORDER, BUT COULD YOU DELIVER TO ALL PEOPLE THE ABILITY TO SEE BEYOND RACIAL, ECONOMIC, POLITICAL AND SOCIAL PREJUDICES AND ALLOW THEM TO SEE THAT ALL OF GOD'S CHILDREN ARE CREATED EQUAL AND ARE LOVED IN HIS EYES?
ALSO, I HAVE A LITTLE SISTER THAT IS A GOOD BASKETBALL PLAYER AND I HAVE ENJOYED PLAYING WITH HER. I'LL BE LEAVING FOR A DIFFERENT LEAGUE NEXT YEAR...SO WOULD YOU BRING HER MY "WOW" FACTOR, PLAYMAKING ABILITIES AND SKILL TO HIT FROM ANYWHERE ON THE COURT...SO SHE CAN LEAD OUR TEAM TO CONTINUED GREAT SUCCESS? SHE'S GOT A TON OF TALENT AND THESE ADDITIONAL GIFTS JUST MIGHT MAKE HER THE BEST GUARD IN THE LAND NEXT YEAR.
( Shoni's letter was delivered at break-neck speed, driving between two defenders and tossed without looking, behind her back into Santa's mailbag.)
We here at CARDINAL COUPLE wish you the best of the holidays and hope you dreams and wishes come true.